Today, we look at the fifth of The 10 Greatest Gifts principles outlined by Steven W. Vannoy in his 1994 book.  You will recall that we examined “the gift of balance” the last time.  These principles also apply very well to adults working in the business world and can help us work better with others and understand, for ourselves, how we can be most productive and effective in every walk of life.

What is the principle of the gift of humor?  Vannoy defines it like this:

“Not teasing, not taunting someone because they’re different or less powerful, but a genuine expression of joy at the pleasures and ironies and foibles of life.”

Most people underestimate the value and power of a good sense of humor. One of our colleagues recently mentioned to me that he obtained a job in a competitive process once simply because he showed a sense of humor during the interviews.  When you show a sense of humor, you show your humanity and earn credibility (assuming the humor is appropriate).

Don’t feel you need to be serious in every moment in every situation. Don’t be afraid to exhibit your true personality.  Showing a sense of humor demonstrates that you want to be relevant and connect with others.  Following are a few thoughts that might help you learn more about this important attribute (note that all of these are anonymous, unless otherwise stated):

• Don’t worry if plan A fails, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet.

• I’m not clumsy! The floor just hates me, the table and chairs are bullies, and the walls get in my way.

• Doing nothing is hard, you never know when you’re done.

• If you’re hotter than me, then that means I’m cooler than you.

• My friend, remember that without stupidity there wouldn’t be intelligence, and without ugliness there wouldn’t be beauty, so the world needs you after all.

• Stop texting me in the middle of texting you… now I have to change my text.

 

• Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else. – Alison Boulter

• Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance? – Edgar Bergen

• My cell phone is acting up, I keep pressing the home button but when I look around, I’m still at work.

• There is a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot. – Steven Wright

• A joke is a very serious thing. – Winston Churchill

• There is no better moment to postpone something you don’t want to do other than right now.

 

• I just wanted you to know that somebody cares. Not me, but somebody does.

 

Enjoy the day! Find something (or someone) that makes you smile.

 

You may not believe this, but I have never run a marathon. Yes, that’s right… not one.  However, I have always been fascinated by the crowds that do run.  I guess I am even more fascinated by the crowds that line these events.  Large marathon events often draw thousands of fans that line the 26+ mile route the cheer on the participants.  When you see the interviews or comments of participants after the race, you often hear them comment that they reached a point part-way through the race when they thought they couldn’t go on, but the crowds of encouragers cheered them on and they received a burst of energy that held them to the end.

Have you ever stopped to understand why encouragement is important? When you look at the root of this word, you see the word ‘courage’ right in the middle of it.  Normally, you think of courage as that intestinal ingredient that spurs us onward in the face of great opposition.  You think of the Lion in the Wizard of Oz that asks the wizard to award him with courage to help him be the King of the Jungle.  Courage is that element that gives us boldness, strength to face an adversary, and exceptional ability to overcome long odds.  So, when you encourage someone, you are essentially giving them courage to keep going… to stay the course… to keep doing more than they think they can… hold their head high…   When you encourage someone, you give them strength to endure… to finish the race… to overcome their hurts and obstacles.  Encouragement is the only thing, at times, that keeps one going or allows one to keep putting one step in front of another.

I truly appreciate encouragement. And, it seems it comes at just the right time.  I have a hand-written note from an anonymous individual that I keep on my desk.  It is a note of encouragement that I remove from the envelope at least once a month and read.  When I am feeling particularly challenged, that little note helps me get through the fog.  And, when I am encouraged, it motivates me to encourage others.  That’s how it works.  When someone else takes the time and effort to encourage you, you naturally want to go encourage someone else.  It is contagious.

So, today, please consider how you can ‘give courage’ to someone else by encouraging them. You never know when a positive word from you can make the difference to another.  And, you should never assume that someone doesn’t need encouragement.  Everyone needs to be encouraged sometime!  So, think about how you might help someone else run the last half of their own marathon.  Think of someone that might be on the verge of quitting, or someone that is discouraged, or just someone that has made a difference to you and give them a pat on the back (or a note or call or email or personal visit or that overdue thanks).  You might never know how much it is needed or appreciated.

Thanks for all you do to make the world a better place. Let’s go have one of those “best days yet!”

 

I recently read the following story on values.com, a website that has stories, videos, and inspirational materials that you might find useful. Take a look…..

RISING ABOVE: You Can Be Different (by Fran)

My parents had split up and my sister and I were in a foster home. It wasn’t a nice place to be and all of the children were eventually removed. It wasn’t a good start in life. Some of the kids that were there were already well on their way to a life of crime. Waiting for the bus one morning they engaged in screaming at one of the teachers as she drove by. I was told that they would beat me up if I didn’t scream at her too. Those were still the days of slapping your hand with a ruler if you misbehaved in school. She was my teacher. I crept into the classroom. My eyes and head down. I heard my name and cowered my way to the teachers desk fully expecting the ruler. She took me by the arm and pulled me close as I was pulling the other way. She said stop … Come here. She gently cupped her hands around my ear and said ‘you can be different’. I was stunned. I looked her in the eyes and she said again ‘you can be different’, you don’t have to be like them’. It made all the difference. It was an epiphany that struck at a very early age. I became successful in life and never felt the need to ever engage in activities that were damaging to another person. I could be me. The beating in the flesh was far less than the beating I took in my soul the day I was so unkind to my teacher … And yet she gave me a life well lived with those few simple words … You can be different.

When I read this, I couldn’t help but think of all the other ways Fran’s teacher could have reacted to her incident. She could have punished her.  She could have lectured her.  She could have embarrassed her in front of the entire class.  But, she took that moment as a quiet ‘teaching moment’ that made a difference in Fran’s life.

We all have such moments in our home and work life. We have events that demand a response from us.  We might choose from a variety of responses that often occur without any thought as to the ultimate impact of our actions.  We might strike out in anger or express disappointment or even outrage.  However, when we assume the position of “teacher” we begin looking at events from a different viewpoint.  As a “teacher” we begin to see events as an opportunity to make a POSITIVE lasting difference in a person’s life.  Honestly, we don’t have to be like everyone else when these events occur… we can be different!

Thanks for all you do! Have a wonderful day filling with ‘teaching moments.’

Yesterday, we discussed the importance of balance in aspects of our lives. As promised, the graphic below illustrates my thoughts on achieving proper balance in ten different categories or behaviors.  Take a look at the graphic above.

What can you learn about yourself by reviewing these items and seeing what true balance looks like? Does this reveal changes that may be needed in your own life or behaviors?

Have a truly fabulous day! Thanks for all you do!

 

 

Today, we look at the fourth of The 10 Greatest Gifts principles outlined by Steven W. Vannoy in his 1994 book.  You will recall that we examined “growing your self-esteem” the last time.  These principles also apply very well to adults working in the business world and can help us work better with others and understand, for ourselves, how we can be most productive and effective in every walk of life.

What is the principle of self-esteem?  Vannoy defines it like this:

“I want to set a model of balance – emotional, physical, spiritual, and intellectual balance. I want them to know that the journey of life includes both pain and joy, work and play.  Each one teaches you about the other.  They all keep a life healthy and productive.”

It is the rare person that has achieved perfect balance in all aspects of their life. We tend to focus on areas where problems exist, or on things we particularly like to do, or on activities we feel generate the most value.  But, as you can see from Vannoy’s statement above, we all need to understand that life brings highs and lows, good and bad, happy and sad.  We cannot stay on one plane all the time.  And, we must ensure that we re-balance our lives occasionally to ensure that one area of our life does not overbear or overburden all the others.

I think we all realize that there are times when things just normally get out-of-balance. For instance, when you have a huge or significant project than needs your full attention for two weeks.  Other areas may suffer during this time, but a critical project might cause short-term pain.  However, we should not attempt to sustain a badly out-of-balance situation because it can hamper others areas of our lives.  And, when you do get out-of-balance, it is good to have someone in your life that can objectively help you see it.

I think we have all heard the saying, “No one has ever said on their deathbed that they wish they had spent more time in the office.” Or, this one about raising children, “The days are long, but the years are short.  Enjoy them!”  These both speak to maintaining a proper work/life balance.  However, we can falter in other areas and ways, just as well.  Tomorrow on The Porch, you will see “The Balance Continuum” – an illustration on balance that reflects a number of common attributes or behaviors that can get out-of-balance.  So, you can look forward to that.

For today, consider the four areas of your life that Vannoy mentions above – emotional, physical, spiritual, and intellectual. Are you properly balanced in each area?  Are there things you need to consider changing to re-balance your life?  Do you have someone you trust that can help you see your blind-spots?

Have a splendid day! This could be our best yet… at least it could be a top-ten day.  Watch for it!

Today, Leigh Fuller (a colleague and friend) poses an interesting question to us, “Do you know the difference between a cough and a sneeze?” Now, before you jump to conclusions, there is a difference and it might have more to do with history and culture than you might think.  Take a look at Leigh’s thoughts:

How many times have you had a quality issue arise and provided a solution because “we’ve done this before”? Does the fact that “we’ve done this before” mean that it is the best course of action to take based on compliance risk, current regulatory requirements, trends or risk? It is important to make sure we understand the situation and risk before finalizing our decisions. Not being thoughtful about our decisions could make us an organization that takes too much risk or in some situations, not enough risk.  

This triggered a parallel in my mind recently. Why do we say “bless you” when someone sneezes?  National Geographic reports that in AD 590 that Pope Gregory I started the phase “God bless you” since sneezing was often the sign that someone had contracted the plague and would likely die. There are also stories of people believing that sneezing could be a person’s soul being thrown from their body. Regardless of how it all began, it has become a cultural norm for people to say “bless you” when someone sneezes. You are considered rude if you do not offer a “bless you” to someone in close proximity when they sneeze.  If I cough in front of my two year old twins they often say “bless you”.  They do not understand the difference between a cough and a sneeze.

So the questions I leave you with today are… Do you know what cultural norms you are creating by following the historical norms? Do you know the difference between a cough and a sneeze?

By doing the same things the same ways we’ve always done them, we create paradigms that are often impossible to change. Just ask someone from Michigan to stop calling a soft drink “pop” instead of “soda” or “cola”.  Historical practices can often become cultural norms that cause us to do things that we really should not do.  Here are a few more examples:

• Our reject rate has always been around 10%, yet we get excited to see an improvement to only 8% rejections — Why not go crazy and look to improve to less than 5% rejections?
• “Our Policy does not allow for that, even if it is a good idea.” — Why not change the Policy? It can be done!
• We might be delayed on that because we have to go through the __________ Committee — If it is something that really makes a difference and needs to get done, why not try to avoid meaningless or non-value added steps?

I think Leigh’s point is a great one… perhaps we should re-consider today what we do and why we do it. We should ask, “Are we doing this because it makes good sense or are we doing it because it is considered the cultural or historical norm?”

Thanks, Leigh, great job! Let’s have one of those “top ten” days today!

 

Today, we look at the third of The 10 Greatest Gifts principles outlined by Steven W. Vannoy in his 1994 book.  You will recall that we examined “self-esteem” the last time.  These principles also apply very well to adults working in the business world and can help us work better with others and understand, for ourselves, how we can be most productive and effective in every walk of life.

What is the gift of compassion Vannoy discusses?  Vannoy defines it like this:

“…being compassionate means coming from a special place in your heart and mind, appreciating and valuing everything and everyone’s place in the grand scheme of life. I know that’s difficult some days, so be compassionate with yourself, too, and acknowledge yourself for doing as well as you are.”

In his book, Vannoy talks about teaching our children that everyone has value and that they need to extend grace (that is, a forgiving hand) to others. And, they need to give themselves a break in the process.  I think the key point here is that if we are unwilling to extend compassion to ourselves, it is doubly difficult to be compassionate with others.

Why is compassion so important in today’s world, especially the business world? I think there are several key points here:

 

1. Compassion leads to kindness and kindness generally is an outgrowth of integrity
2. Integrity is critical to business relationship and business success
3. Compassion helps leaders get the very best results from their teams
4. Compassion gives you a fresh perspective that you might not have otherwise

 

Who of us has not experienced or needed compassion from someone else? And, when your leader extends compassion to you, don’t you feel even more committed to doing your best?  Growing a sense of compassion does not mean you are soft on accountability.  It simply means that you are able to “walk a mile in the other individual’s shoes” and that you try to see things from the perspective of others.  You must still demand performance and accountability, but doing so with understanding.  As a leader, showing compassion shows you care.  And, when you care, your integrity grows.  You have heard it here many times… 

“People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.” – Theodore Roosevelt

Demonstrating compassion will help you be happier and more successful in every aspect of your life…. Guaranteed! Have a terrific day!

 

 

My wife and I had a home built in the country a few years ago. During the construction process, we frequently traveled to the site to watch the progress.  I still recall how much time and effort our builder took with the home foundation.  After digging the hole, he used many tons of gravel to provide a solid and drainable base in the hole.  He poured footers (the concrete base upon which the walls sit.  Then the foundation was poured with extensive supporting re-enforcement bars suspended in it.  He built a pipe drainage system around the foundation.  Finally, he coated the foundation with water-proofing material.  It was obvious that the foundation of the home was perhaps the most important component simply because everything else relied upon it for support, balance, and structure.

First things, first. You have heard that said many times.  When building a house, the foundation comes first and must be able to withstand tremendous stress.  What comes first for you?  Have you established the values by which you live your life?  Have you determined what, no matter what, gets first priority in your life.

In a company, such as our health-care company, it is clear that the foundation should be our patients. We exist solely to serve our patients’ needs.  From our inception, when we began by relieving the pain our patients were suffering, to today with our dozens of products, our existence has been based upon meeting the needs of our health-care patients.  Often, in our day-by-day work, there is a tendency to forget our foundation of patient-first.  We work to accomplish our very specific and often parochial job to hit an objective, drive down costs, meet financial goals, etc.  However, we must never forget our patients without whom we have no company at all.  Our patients depend upon us doing our jobs extremely well.  For some, their lives and the lives of their families depend upon our products.  Let’s not let them down…. Ever!

In your life, is it clear what comes first? Some may say their faith comes before anything else.  Others may say their family comes first.  Still others may say that serving others is their most important thing.  Do you know for sure what comes first?  Do others know what is most important to you?  Having that clear and firm foundation for life serves as a base upon which everything else is built.  And, we should never have to apologize for what we have chosen as a “first thing.”

So, in our work, let’s re-affirm our commitment today that our patients come first. Everything we do should be done with our patients’ best interests in mind.  In our personal lives, let’s re-affirm what is our true “first thing.”  Let’s individually ensure that we are staying true to those core beliefs we hold.  Thanks for all you do and have a great day!

 

We often spend most of our lives striving for those things we think matter the most… a gratifying career, the appropriate title, the right house in the right neighborhood, happy and successful kids, an abundant bank account, etc. Yet, many individuals never reach the point that they can honestly say they have everything they want.  You might recall the book written by Rick Warren in 2002 called, The Purpose Driven Life.  The book topped the Wall Street Journal best seller charts as well as Publishers Weekly charts with over 30 million copies sold by 2007.   The Purpose Driven Life was also on the New York Times Bestseller List for over 90 weeks.  The popularity of this book demonstrated a desire for individuals to understand their purpose and, ultimately, to attain a rich and meaningful life.

Many have attempted to distill into words how you can attain a satisfying life. Zig Ziglar, popular author and speaker, once said:

“You can have everything in life you want, if you will just help other people get what they want.”

I particularly like Ziglar’s thoughts on this subject for several reasons. Certainly, it has as its focus service to others.  However, it highlights a clear benefit to us when we actively strive to help others.  In short, there is a benefit both to others and ourselves when to serve them.  In essence, when you change the center of your universe away from yourself, you personally benefit.  I have found personally that when I need encouragement, it comes to me in abundance when I look to benefit others.  Serving others can lift you out of the valley, when you find yourself there.

So, bottom line… unless a significant part of your life is spend in improving the lives of others, you may not feel as fulfilled as you would like.  So, give this a test… do something today for someone else and see what benefit comes back at you.  Test Ziglar’s theory that your life is enhanced, when you enhance the life of someone else.

Have a fabulous day! There is still a chance this could be our best day yet!

Today, we look at the second of The 10 Greatest Gifts principles outlined by Steven W. Vannoy in his 1994 book.  You will recall that we examined “feeling fully” the last time.  These principles also apply very well to adults working in the business world and can help us work better with others and understand, for ourselves, how we can be most productive and effective in every walk of life.

What is the principle of self-esteem? Vannoy defines it like this:

“When you have high self-esteem you are nearly invincible. No matter what happens, you still know that you are a good and capable person, that you can do what you need to do again and even better. You have a rich supply of inner strength. You approach every moment, every event, every interaction with an attitude of openness instead of fear, giving instead of taking, acknowledging your strengths rather than your weaknesses. You see abundance and opportunity instead of shortage and trouble.”

Many individuals struggle with low self-esteem. This can result in addictions, depression, a sense of inadequacy, or worse.  There are many theories about how self-esteem is formed in us as individuals, but most believe the feelings we have about ourselves as adults was primarily formed during our early childhood years.  A low self-esteem can hinder us in the workplace, as well.  It can result in an inability to make decisions, unwillingness to assume a new role or task, or a general lack of participation in work or team activities.

So, what can we do to help shape a more positive self-esteem? As adults, are we doomed to life as it is?  Well, of course, I suggest that the answer is, “Yes, we can enhance our self-esteem.  It is possible to shift our thinking to one that is more positive.”  Not suggesting that I am an expert on the subject, I do offer the following 6 key steps that I have observed that work to help enhance self-esteem:

1. Acknowledge and name your strengths – We all have strengths… things we generally do better than anyone else. However, we often forget them in the face of challenges or our weaknesses overshadow those strengths. Take the time to think about what you do well, where you have been successful in the past, and things you bring to the table that can benefit others.
2. Position yourself for success – Failure often comes because we put ourselves in positions in which we are highly unlikely to succeed. For example, if I put myself in a situation in which I have agreed to play a concert piano solo with the St. Louis Symphony, I am destined to fail. Learning to position yourself in ways that provide a high percentage of success is one way to avoid those failures that might drag us down. Focus on your strengths and highlight those, not your weaknesses.
3. Identify the worst-case scenario, then move upward from there – Often, when I am faced with a challenge, I simply ask, “OK, what is the worst case scenario here?” When I look at it from that view, I can see that, at worst, I have a minor delay or easily corrected problem. We can position ourselves for success when you realize that the risk of failure is actually small or minor. This enhances confidence and, ultimately, our success.
4. Nurture relationships with individuals that can provide honest feedback – We need others in our lives that are not afraid to tell us the truth. It is easy to avoid such individuals, but we need someone that can tell us our strengths and weaknesses. When we hear from someone else that we trust that we are phenomenal, it boosts our confidence.
5. See the glass as half full – Individuals often have low self-esteem simply because they do not see the value that they routinely add. Seeing things from a positive perspective instead of a negative one takes work, but it can change our entire attitude.
6. Be realistic – We need to be honest with ourselves. And, in being honest, we are more likely to be objective. The reality is that understanding our value and the contributions we can make will help us realize that we can make a difference and we have to take a back seat to no one else.

Don’t feel as though you must live the rest of your days being inferior and less important than others. Everyone has strengths and everyone has value!  By looking for those strengths that we already possess and building upon them, we can literally change our view.  We can re-build our self-esteem step-by-step, brick-by-brick… if we work at it.  Let’s look for ways to apply the suggestions listed above to allow us a better, more accurate view of our potential and value.  As Vannoy puts it, we need to see more of our “…abundance and opportunity instead of shortage and trouble.”  And, let’s not neglect the honest feedback and advice of a few trusted friends… this might be the tonic we need to push us all forward.

Thanks for all you do! Have a fantastic day and remember, this just might be the day… our very best one yet!