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Today, I would like to share an excerpt from my book, “Achieving your best day yet! A more fulfilling career… a more impactful life.” I think this piece touches on the issue of assessing employee performance that every leader faces. Yet, this question can also serve as that internal gauge with which we assess our own value within an organization, our community, or even our family. Take a few minutes to consider this critical question…

What if Every Employee was Just Like You?

I have frequently had discussions with colleagues about how to assess the performance or attributes of other employees. For example, what factors tip the scale when an employee is on the borderline of the highest rating at year end?  When assessing an employee’s performance, you naturally look at both their overall positive and negative contributions to the team or company.  However, it is often a challenge to determine exactly which way to go when that employee is squarely on the borderline between the two.  Or, if you are struggling to determine whether to hire a candidate, you might find yourself weighing the pros and cons to make that final hiring decision.

One of the ways I look at this situation to assist my decisions is to ask these questions about that individual, “What kind of company would we have if every employee was just like him/her? Would we have a great company?  Or, would it be mediocre?  Would our customers love working with us or hate it?”  It is amazing to me that when I ask these questions, my answer almost always becomes clear.  You form the culture of a company or team person-by-person, action-by-action.  And, having the wrong person can either make an unbelievably positive difference or it can destroy the team.   By making promotion, rating, and hiring decisions based on this set of questions, you can often see clearly the direction you should go.

In the same way, I find that asking those same questions about yourself during an introspective moment can have a profound impact on your own performance and direction. You might ask, “Would this company or team be better or worse if every employee performed just like me?  Or, behaved just like me?  Or, served others just like me?  Or, cared for others just like me?  Or, went the extra mile just like me?  Would this be a better place or more encouraging environment if every employee was just like me?”  If you can be honest about these questions, you can reveal ways that you can become a better employee, better person, or better friend.

Likewise, this same set of questions can help you self-assess in other areas of your life. If every spouse was just like me, would our society be better, happier, and more fulfilling?  If every father/mother was just like me, how would the kids of this world be different?  If every neighbor in our community was just like me, would this be a better place to live?  If every driver was just like me, would our roads be safer and happier?  If every friend was just like me, what would be different about our world?  It is never too late to make a difference.  It is never too late to make those around you better.  It is never too late to turn a bad day for someone else into a good day simply by serving their needs.  In short, it is never too late….

(This book is available through Amazon.com at the following link: https://www.amazon.com/Achieving-your-best-day-yet-ebook/dp/B087ZRSXP8/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=eldon+henson&qid=1611286201&sr=8-1)

Have you ever heard someone say, “I guess it’s just my destiny…” when discussing disappointments in life? I remember the story of one individual that frequently expressed his career disappointments. He was within a few years of retirement and lamented the fact that it seemed that everyone had passed him by. Whereas he believed he had worked conscientiously to serve his company, his title had never risen to that of younger, less experienced colleagues. He ultimately came to believe that “it was just his destiny” to fall short. He failed to realize that his own lack of commitment, dedication, and overall effort was largely to blame for his limited career.

Certainly, there are circumstances in life that we cannot control. Accidents occur. Downsizing happens. Pandemics emerge. Though we like to think so, we do not control every circumstance in our life. When things happen that are unwanted and unexpected, we can become upset, disappointed, and defeated. However, the one thing we can control in any situation regardless of our circumstances is our attitude. Wade Boggs, the Hall of Fame baseball player once said, “Our lives are not determined by what happens to us but how we react to what happens, not by what life brings us but the attitude we bring to life.”

So, you see, to a very large degree, our lives are largely not the result of random events that we neither control nor appreciate. Rather, our lives are defined by the choices we make, whether good or bad. When we learn this critical truth, our lives can change in ways we might never have considered. For example:

• Your path in life is not defined by the disadvantages of your childhood, but by the choices you make to overcome them.
• Your career is not defined by your title, your salary, or your office location, but by how you choose to treat others and the positive impact you make during that career.
• Your relationships are not defined by mistakes you have made in the past, but by how you’ve used those experiences to grow and become a better person.
• Your impact on others is not defined by what is visible on the outside, but by the visible manifestations of the character that resides on the inside.
• Your future is not defined by the past, but by the decisions you make today.

Today would be a great day to put aside the belief that we have no control over destiny and believe that, to a significant degree, we determine our own destiny by the decisions we make.

Below are some thoughts from others that should also help you understand your own responsibility in creating your own destiny.

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“The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be.” 
― Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Letting go means to come to the realization that some people are a part of your history, but not a part of your destiny.” 
― Steve Maraboli

“Destiny is not a matter of chance; it is a matter of choice. It is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved.” 
― William Jennings Bryan

“You are not the victim of the world, but rather the master of your own destiny. It is your choices and decisions that determine your destiny.” 
― Roy T. Bennett

“Don’t confuse poor decision-making with destiny. Own your mistakes. It’s ok; we all make them. Learn from them so they can empower you!” 
― Steve Maraboli

“The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the president. You realize that you control your own destiny.” ― Albert Ellis